


Not letting you fall

by Miledith



Category: Narcos (TV)
Genre: Comfort, Crying, Emotional, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hugs, Neighbors
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 16:20:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29985534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miledith/pseuds/Miledith
Summary: Javier comes back from a tiring day at work and wants to see his neighbor who ends up comforting him.
Relationships: Javier Peña & Reader, Javier Peña & You, Javier Peña/Reader, Javier Peña/You
Kudos: 9





	Not letting you fall

You weren't sure how exactly it started. You were always sort of aware of Javier Peña and there was nothing unusual about it since you two lived in the same apartment building just a few doors from each other. You saw him occasionally in the halls or in the neighborhood but you never really interacted. You heard things about him, like the fact that he worked for the DEA or that he had a habit of sleeping around with various women. You also heard that he was somewhat of an asshole. That didn't really make for the best advertisement, so you unconsciously began avoiding him, through that you learned a little about his routine. You knew what time he would go off to work and when he got back on the nights when he wasn't doing overtime at the office. And all that to avoid the routes of someone you didn't even know. In fact that prejudice surprised you quite a bit as you didn't paint yourself for someone who would go off of first impressions or in this case no impressions at all. One day you got frustrated with that uncalled for judgement of yours and decided to simply walk out of your apartment to check the mail just in time as he was leaving for work. And you just said hello, to which greeting he didn't even respond. You figured it was understandable since you really knew nothing about each other so you continued to do that every few days or so as to not appear too suspicious (though it might have already looked that way). Gradually his lack of a response moved on to nods of acknowledgement, little "mhm's" and eventually he started greeting back. You finally felt like a decent neighbor and even found yourself knocking on his apartment door twice. Once to borrow some coffee and the other time to bring back the container he lent you the first time. Those exchanges were admittedly a little awkward as you never officially introduced yourselves to one another. Sure you knew the names - you from all the hearsay and him most likely from the letterbox you checked so often - but you never spoke more than a few words. Sometime after, that changed and you started to get to know each other. You noticed when he would come from work tired or sometimes worse than that and you developed a little habit of occasionally making too much food for you to eat alone, the rest of it always being left in a box on his doorstep. One time he "caught you red handed" and from then on out you just told him he was free to stop by your place to get a decent meal. You knew he appreciated it a lot, because his eyes betrayed his stonelike facade whenever he would invite himself over. That and the fact that he would rather spend his time at your place than his own. Things started speeding up well into that tradition when sort of a friction appeared between the two of you. At first it was a few more smiles and extended looks, then flirty remarks and subtle touches. You noticed how sometimes when one of you went a little far, he would get shifty and quickly excuse himself to run to his own apartment. You never stopped him, because you felt your own kind of way and usually needed that time to calm down as well. Until one night you did, grabbing his hand and letting everything come at you at full power. That changed the dynamic completely. At the beginning of it you were content, but very soon something started to feel wrong. He would come in and leave the stress of work behind by having his way with you and to be fair he never did anything that you didn't consent to. But that was a temporary relief, a quick fix, and you realized you started caring too much for it to go on this way. You saw a broken man who desperately tried to put the pieces together in ways that would never hold. It had to change…

-Javi, no. - You said softly, taking a step back, escaping his touch like it was burning. He looked at you with dark, dangerous eyes. Those same eyes that hid the sense of pain behind them.  
-Don't be ridiculous. - He said, his voice low. You could almost feel the air vibrate. He took a step closer, reaching out for your waist. Oh that voice and those hands… they called to you like a siren's song and for a split second you wanted to give in. But that was no longer an option. You let him grab you, only to reach your hands to his and sternly take them off your body, holding his wrists for a few seconds while you mustered the courage, looking to your feet.  
-I said no. - You repeated, this time looking into his eyes, your own all of a sudden feeling moist from tears that pricked them, threatening to spill out. You didn't want to cry over yourself, but rather for him. - Not this time. - You released his wrists only to bring your fingers to his face, lightly touching his cheeks before your palms connected to his skin. His gaze was riddled with confusion.  
-I know you are not fine Javi. You can't hide that from me, you know? - Your tone of concern stirred something in him. Never before has he felt like this. Like someone ripped him open but at the same time making him feel safe. Your thumbs started gently tracing the lines in the corners of his eyes. The ice in them started melting, revealing what you already saw, a feeling of tiredness and sadness. He couldn't move, suddenly incapacitated by a force stronger than anything he knew. He could only watch as your face got closer to his. His gaze darted from your eyes to your lips in anticipation of what comes next. But he didn't get what he expected when you placed a soft kiss on his cheek, raising a bit on your toes. The next one came a little higher on his cheekbone, another on the temple of his head and by that point you didn't need to make yourself any taller. His frame got smaller and by the last kiss, the one on his forehead, his shoulders began shuddering as if he was cold. Javier's breath started to hitch and its even tempo was replaced by one much louder and uncoordinated. Sometimes broken things need to fall apart completely to be built back up again and just like that Javier Peña, DEA was shattered. Seconds later he slumped into you, his head falling onto your shoulder and arms squeezing tightly around your back as if you were the one who could break at any moment. Sobs shook his entire body and you stood there, partially in shock as one of your hands rested on the man's back, stroking it delicately, the other on his neck, doing the same. The shirt on your shoulder became wet and under that intense wave of feelings your eyes also filled with tears.  
-It's okay. - You promised quietly. - I am here, I'm not letting you fall. - A set of different words tried to make their way into your mouth but you kept it shut, leading Javi slowly to the living room couch where you both could settle comfortably. Once there, you sat down, not even needing to convince him or push in any way to do the same. He lowered himself onto the cushions, following you and still not letting go, his arms wrapped around you in a tight embrace. You gently took them away just for a moment, so you could shift your position to better accommodate him, sitting in his lap with legs to one side and your body slightly twisted to face his. A gentle, soothing hum passed by your lips as you began stroking his muscled back just along his spine as far as the tight space between his slumped body and the back of the couch allowed you to. A long time has passed before his sobs started to ease out and his body began relaxing against yours. In all that time he kept hugging you closely, never pulling away to even as much as look at your face. In fact you were pretty sure he kept his eyes shut through it all and you didn't mind in the least, knowing how strange and uncomfortable it must have been for him to allow anyone to see him fall apart like that. If closing his eyes gave him some sort of comfort, you were all the happier for him to keep them that way. You spent the next few minutes in almost complete stillness, his shoulders no longer shaking and your hands gradually ceasing any movement before settling in place. You weren't sure if there even was a right moment for you to pull back and you almost didn't want to make that decision, but you knew you had to eventually. Besides, your twisted back started to ache just a little from the position you were in. When you finally peeled yourself away from him, you took his face in your hands, looking into his eyes, that he finally decided to open. They were red and swollen, but beautiful nonetheless you thought.  
-Better? - Your voice came out barely above a whisper. He nodded, your palms still cupping his stubbled cheeks. And then you kissed him, gently and with intent, pouring all of the feelings that had been filling up inside you into that gesture. It was familiar, yet completely different from all the times you had done it before. This time it wasn't lust, desperation or even attraction that flooded through you as you pressed your lips into his, it was pure affection and adoration - all the things you felt for him deep inside whenever you caught a glimpse of who he really was under the mask of the harsh and mighty DEA agent he portrayed himself as. And before you could even stop yourself, the words you held back before, now spilled through your mouth in a moment you took to breathe.  
-I love you Javi.  
A sharp inhale you heard from him fell onto you like a heavy weight settling in your chest. He was about to tell you off, wasn't he? You opened your mouth, but before you could even blurt out any form of apology or retract your statement, he pushed you back at arm's length, his hands on your shoulders and his eyes carefully studying your face like he was looking for some sign of… something.  
-You aren't lying to me, are you? - His voice was raspy from crying and laced with suspicion and something else. Hope? The only response you could come up with was a shake of your head as you desperately tried to look anywhere but at his face. You felt ridiculous, even though just moments ago you were sharing the most intimate moment you ever had with each other.  
-Say it. - He almost demanded before adding - Please. - this time much softer and quieter. It took a second for you to gather that bit of courage again.  
-I'm not lying to you. - You said stiffly, now hyper aware of your surroundings and especially the way you two sat. There were no take backs, you knew it. - I love you. - You repeated firmly. And then the air in your lungs was almost punched out of you by the momentum with which he pulled you in for another tight embrace.  
-How in the hell do you always manage to make things so much better. - He murmured very close to your ear. - You just can't give me a break, can you? - His shoulders shook again and at first you thought he was crying again, until you heard it. A soft chuckle filling his chest with air and vibrating through your body. You were certain this would be the best thing you'd hear that night but what he said next beat it into the ground, stomped on it and rolled over in what remained.  
-I love you too. So much it hurts.

**Author's Note:**

> Yay, my first work on ao3! I recently got hooked on everything Pedro Pascal related and you know I'm a sucker for that sweet, sweet, emotional fluff. This might become the first of many Pedro boys fics (if I have the motivation to write) so keep an eye out for that. Oh and ofc leave your opinions or even suggestions for future stuff.


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